Okay, part 2
why am I blogging this now?
I read a lot of Nie the last few days.
Especially her sister's blog who wrote while Nie was in a coma. (I went back in the archives to the day the accident happened and read forward from there).
I don't have to only blog about happy life.
It's okay that I am mad as heck and I don't care who knows it.
Because I am.
I am mad at the world for separating us.
I am mad at the ridiculous, inhumane expectations to work 20 out of 24 hours.
Yes, maybe I am naive and irresponsible and want to run away and live off of love and wishes. But that's why we got married so young, right? No amount of time is ever enough together.
Okay, enough with the pity party.
We have a really, really good life. A great life. A perfect life when we are all together.
In fact, it's kind of an off day when my boys don't say at least once, "THIS IS THE BEST DAY EVER!" or for short simply, "BEST DAY EVER!"
We try to protect the kids as much as possible from the reality of Chris's grueling schedule (although obvi they are aware). We meet for lunch. We make Sunday FUNDAY (as reverently and appropriately as possible, obviously). During the week, the boys and I will take dinner up for Chris to the office. And we always do pizza and movie night Fridays (even if he has to go back to work after). We Skype. We talk speaker phone throughout the day. We paint pictures for dad to take to work. We try to steal time away every day or two for just our family.
Last week before the miserably cold, rainy weather returned we snuck in a lunch break beach day.
It was a "BEST DAY EVER" for sure.
It made me remember all the reasons I love Milwaukee so much.
Like how the lake sounds just like the ocean, so I pretend that it is.
And because I am pretty sure frozen custard is the state food.
Or how we can live in a suburb that feels like a small town, but is only minutes from downtown which makes it possible to meet Chris for spontaneous outings when he can take a quick break.
And that downtown is filled with so many fun things for us to do on lunch breaks: the beach, Discovery World, the Milwaukee Public Museum, the library, the children's museum...
But since we make time for family. There isn't a lot left for us.
Me and the Mr.
Besties.
BFFs
Hence the reason for the pity party. But Nie has inspired me. She does a great job of making a big deal out of the little things: May Day, Back to School, every holiday, etc. Tomorrow is Nate's last day of school. Yes, he only attended two days a week (for 2 hours a day). But it is still cause for celebration so I am signing off because I have a party to plan!
Love,
J.
3 comments:
sorry for the second comment now, but can i just say, you do AMAZING at making Chris included in ya'lls day. truly, i don't know that i would think of all those wonderful, sweet things. i would just be having my own little pitty party. and not thinking about my husband not being involved. and how that hurts him.
like i said before, i am sending virtual hugs, and praying for family time (and especially mommy & daddy time) for your precious little family.
Isnt is amazing that we spend so much time while they are in school longing for them to be done, and then real life comes and its even WORSE?! The positive is that it will get better. It takes time to get in, it takes time to start out in every new phase of life, but you are doing so well! You do a great job taking care of the boys and making every day count for them. I know this longing you feel to have him around. I feel that a LOT, too. But you can do it, you ARE doing it.
"I think I can, I think I can, I think I can" as you trudge up the next hill and the next. You can do it!
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